Yesterday marks the 7th anniversary of Erica's passing. I try not to dwell on just how much I still miss her but yesterday I allowed myself to spend the day grieving. I have started something new in my life and there is a part of me that wishes desperately that I could share it with her, I know she would be as excited as I am and have just as many idea's as I do and that she would have been the perfect person to embark on this adventure with, but that isn't the way this life plays out......so my new adventure is baking cupcakes, but not just any cupcakes, I'm making Drink inspired cupcakes like; margaritas, lemon drops, Bailey's Irish cream and so on. So in honor of my dear friend, who enjoyed Goldschlager, I made her a Goldschlager cuptail....with gold stars.

I can’t believe she has been gone for 5 years. I still miss her, I still wish I could pick up the phone and call her, I still wish I could say “let’s have lunch” or go shopping or just hang out, but I can’t and it’s sad.

Today is a beautiful sunny day in the Northwest and since we don’t see a lot of these I know people will be rushing out to get “some sun” before it disappears behind the clouds. Excuses like, “I need the vitamin D” or “it’s just for a few minutes, just to get a little color” will spill from the lips of the Northwesterner today but it is so important to protect yourself and the ones you love. The tan (or burn) will fade but the damage it does won’t and in the case of Erica the damage was enough to take her life. So pop a vitamin D supplement, apply some 30 SPF and go out and enjoy this day! I know Erica would if she could!

OUCH!

So every 6 months I go see the dermatologist in order to have her check my spots. Well 2 years ago she found a spot that she didn’t like and after a biopsy of the spot, it was decided that I would have it removed. Since then, my check ups have been great and so today when I went in I was all ready to get the “everything thing looks fine” report make an appointment for 6 months. Actually I was really hoping that it was going to be so great that I wouldn’t have to make an appointment for another year but not so much. She found a spot that she didn’t like. Amazing, to the naked eye it just looked like a regular mole but under her magnify glass you could see that it had a slightly irregular edge, so now I have 2 stitches and a “no swimming order” from my doc. Oh yeah, and the opportunity to stress while the pathology lab checks out my chunk of flesh under a microscope. But I also know that melanoma caught early is very curable and would rather have her find something suspicious now before it’s had a chance to turn into something deadly.

Another good check up only this time I was America's top model with spots.

I went in and she checked all my spots, didn't see anything that she didn't like, so she won't be removing anything this time. But I did get to have my pictures taken. Ooh boy, was that fun.

The University of Washington does a mole mapping that is pretty intense and clothing is not an option. Thank goodness I didn't have to go there. My pictures are going to be more of the seedy type that could only be found in the file of the dermatologists office (at least that's what I was promised). It wasn't so bad and now they have a something to compare my spots too, just in case something does change.

Free and clear!




I just had my six month spot check and I’m good for another six months. Of course there is always at least one mole that she says she doesn’t like but keep an eye on it.

I can’t urge people enough to get their moles checked on a regular basis. For me, since they found a mole once that they didn’t like and the results came back Mild Atypia, they like to keep a closer eye on me. But if you have skin, especially skin with moles, fair, burns easily, sun damaged, etc. Go see your dermatologist! Every six months I get a little peace of mind. If everything is clear – great, fantastic, hooray but if something should be “suspicious”, then I know that we will have caught it in time and that is the key to surviving skin cancer!

Make your appointment NOW! Encourage your family and friends to do the same! Melanoma is not the cancer that you want to mess around with!

Possibly some good News!

Protein Fuels Melanoma's Growth
Discovery could lead to new treatments for deadly skin cancer, researchers say
MONDAY, Dec. 27 (HealthDayNews) -- A protein that plays a critical role in the growth of the deadly skin cancer melanoma has been identified by scientists at Dana-Farber Cancer Institute and Children's Hospital Boston.

They found that malignant melanoma can't grow without a steady supply of this protein, called CDK2. Normal cells don't need CDK2.

The findings suggest it may be possible to develop drugs that cut off the supply of CDK2 to melanoma cells. This may prove an effective way to halt the growth of melanoma without causing damage to other cells.

In research with laboratory-grown melanoma cells, the scientists found that adding a chemical that suppressed the activity of the CDK2 gene, which produces CDK2 protein, significantly slowed the growth and spread of melanoma cells.

CDK2-inhbiting drugs already exist, the study authors noted. They hope their study results will lead to clinical trials of these drugs in people with melanoma.
The study appears in the December issue of Cancer Cell.
More information
The American Academy of Family Physicians has more about melanoma (familydoctor.org ).
Where I found this article - http://www.healthcentral.com/newsdetail/408/523037.html

Melanoma - why do I care? One word, ERICA!






My friend Erica was a beautiful, loving and happy person. She was the kind of person who could enter a room and people would flock to her. She had an infectious laugh and people enjoyed being in her presence. I can’t think of a time in her life where she ever lacked friends, everywhere she worked, went to school, lived, she always had an abundance of friends. I considered myself unusually lucky to have her consider me one of her best friends. Friends like that don’t come along often and when they die, a part of you dies with them.



She and I met back in 1987. She worked at a store called J.Jacob’s. I went there with my boyfriend at the time to do some shopping. She was 5’6”ish with long blond hair and about 110 pounds and she was telling my boyfriend that he should come to her party. Ahem, I was right there. Of course, right after that I immediately asked him why “that girl” was inviting him to a party right in front of me. Well, it turns out that she was good friends with the girls that lived in the apartment below us and it was their party and of course I could come too. Well shortly after that, she moved in to the 4-plex where my boyfriend and I lived and we became great friends. She always denied hitting on my boyfriend and I believe her, it was her style to have many friends (both men and women) and entertain. She lived to entertain! In fact one of the last things that she did was throw an Easter party (this I will come back to).



We became partners in crime. Going out on Thursday nights, shopping together, lunches, movies, flirting with boys, spending time helping each other pick out the perfect outfit for parties, doing our hair and make-up together and much more. One of our favorite pastimes was doing photo shoots. We would pick a location and take pictures of each other being goofy, it was fun. Of course we were growing up, getting educations and maturing, but our friendship stayed strong.



Over the years, we did go in opposite directions at times, but one phone call or letter would erase all the time apart and it was like we were 19 again. By the time we were in our 30’s we had settled into our careers and were on our way to figuring out who we were as women. For me, I had my son and God. For her, she found a great love in a long time friend, she married that guy. But happily ever after didn’t happen for her.

We met up for beers one night, me and my then boyfriend (not the same guy as before but still not the one I married –the one before him), and her and her fiancé. At one point she said, “ooh get that itch” and he knew exactly where to scratch. She told me that she had a place on her back that itched all the time and that her fiancé thought that she should get it checked by her doctor. An itch – who worries about an itch? They got married and it was beautiful. She looked great and everything went off perfectly. Until she finally made that doctors appointment.



Shortly after her wedding I met my future husband. In less than 9 months I was planning my own wedding and she was going to be my matron of honor. She came over to my house to get measured for her dress and asked if there was anything we could do to make sure her scars from her mole removals didn’t show. I remember asking her why she had those 2 moles removed and she said because they were cancerous. I was so ignorant at the time that I thought that was all that needed to be done and I told her I was glad that they removed them. I didn’t realize that her life was in jeopardy and that she was starting a very rough and devastating journey. She had melanoma.


At first the doctors had thought that they had removed all of the cancerous moles and the hope was that the cancer, if it continued, would move in a downward motion and not up. At the time they thought she had stage III cancer but possibly stage IV. It turns out it wasn’t moving down but it was moving up. It wasn’t long before it was in her lymph system and she had a few surgeries to try to remove lumps. It was becoming more obvious that this cancer was aggressive and so aggressive measures would need to be taken. Since conventional chemo doesn’t work on this kind of cancer, she was researching alternatives, things that were approved in Canada but not here in the states. Her doctors were trying “new treatments” as well. Unfortunately she didn’t always know if she was getting the actual medication or a placebo.








I will never forget the Saturday morning when I began to realize the severity of her cancer. I was the first one up and was relaxing while reading my book and drinking coffee. I remember the phone ringing at about 9:30 and thinking “who is calling so early on a Saturday?” and running to answer the phone before it woke everyone up. The news wasn’t good. She had had a body scan and they had found spots on her liver and her lungs. After we hung up, I got that sinking feeling that everything was not going to be OK. I realized for the first time that I just might be losing my best friend.


Things never really got better even though she did her best to remain hopeful. This was a scary time and I felt so helpless most of the time, all I could do was to let her know that I was praying for her. About a month and a half before she passed she called. I didn’t hear the phone ring and it went to voice mail. When I got a chance to listen to the message, she was distraught and crying, she wanted me to come over as soon as possible. I did. She told me how she felt like God was abandoning her and she felt alone and scared. Over the years, we didn’t see eye to eye about God. I was involved with church and building a relationship with Jesus, and she wanted a cookie cutter religion that would fit her needs. God was trying to get her attention. Luckily my husband, who is a very spiritual man, was there and with his help, she made the choice to follow God. Her thirst for His love and His Word were insatiable. She wanted to do all the things that a born again Christian does, she wanted a Bible, she wanted to tell everyone about her faith and very importantly to her, she wanted to get baptized.

Well like I mentioned earlier, she loved to entertain. As a last ditch effort her doctors decided to try chemo, unfortunately this made her very sick. The cancer in her liver was making it difficult for her liver to work properly and things were going downhill fast. She was admitted to the hospital in order to help her manage the pain and whatever else they could do to help. She called me from the hospital to say she wanted to have and Easter party, could I help? Of course I could. On the Thursday before Easter, my husband and I went to visit her in the hospital. She was so sick and in so much pain, she had lost so much weight and just didn’t look like herself anymore but she was glad to see us and all she could talk about was getting baptized and planning the Easter celebration.

While I visited with Erica, our husbands went out for a brief walk. We spoke for a little while but she was tired and we needed to get home to our family. I will never forget the elevator ride down to our car. My husband told me that her husband said they would be leaving the hospital the next day. I knew that she was too sick to go home and that by sending her home, they were killing her. She had already signed the DNR (do not resuscitate) form and she was going home to die.


That Friday before Easter, as she lay on her couch, surrounded by family and friends, my husband baptized her. We prayed and cried and it was a beautiful moment that is forever burned into my soul. Easter Sunday came and she was surrounded by more family and friends and laughter and love. My husband read to her the story of Jesus going to the cross while she and others listened; there really has never been a more perfect Easter. Her life on this earth was coming to an end but her eternal life was just beginning.

She passed away on April 20th, 2004, quietly, peacefully at home. Her struggle was over, her pain was gone, and she was now at home.










Watching a loved one struggle with disappointing news, go through painful treatments only to lose their life anyway is painful, discouraging and makes you feel utterly helpless. I write about her and I talk about melanoma all the time. I’m sure my friends and family have heard more than they care too, but if it saves one persons life, if it keeps families and friends from experiencing the depression, anxiety, hopelessness and despair that cancer can bring then I will continue talking about it. Skin cancer is not a death sentence IF it’s caught early enough, that’s why it important to get your skin checked regularly. And don’t be ignorant to think that just because you don’t have moles or freckles that you can’t get it. Everyone has skin and even if it’s not melanoma, there are other kinds of skin cancers that you should be aware of.

I hope you enjoyed the story of Erica and why it is so important to me to spread the word about melanoma. Go see your doctor, get your skin checked, wear sunscreen, and live a long and healthy life.